by Lynn Sanders | Jun 1, 2018 | DMM Blog
“Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.” Anais Nin
There’s nothing like having friends.
That feeling of closeness between kindred spirits is simply delightful. That’s why most of us loved the TV series, “Friends.” It was popular because you could sense the underlying, REAL friendship between the characters on the program. Their spirit of having fun together was mesmerizing. We couldn’t wait to watch another episode.
Millions tuned in regularly, because we really cared about Joey, Monica, Ross, Phoebe, Rachel and Chandler. We knew all about them. It didn’t matter if the plot was fictional. The point was – the TV “Friends” were our virtual friends! (Of course, it was a one-sided relationship because the actors didn’t actually talk with us. We just listened to them.)
Now, with the world getting closer through the internet, we have many opportunities to become friends with people through our computer screen. We call them, “virtual friends.”
What does being a virtual friend mean?
Virtual friendship IS a real friendship. It’s friendship with those you’ve never met in person. Google says: “True virtual friends are never in the same physical presence of one another.”
But what happens when your friendship grows so strong that you want to meet in person? I have to admit. It gets even better! There is nothing like a real hug. Virtual friends can still become in-person friends, who you just get to see more often through a computer screen.
Two members of the Go Read community have been virtual friends of mine for a long time: @Roland Takaoka and @Burt Kempner. Both live on opposite sides of the country – California and Florida. Both are talented professionals. And both are people I care very much about.
At this point, I’ve been lucky enough to meet Roland and his wife twice. I hope to meet Burt and his wife at some point in the future. (Yes I do, Burt!)
A short story of my virtual friendship with Roland.
Our Meeting
Roland reached out to me after watching one of my live Google Hangout On Air programs. He liked my show, “The Difference Makers, and we found it easy to talk.
Using a live video format called a “Google chat” (or “Google hangout”), we could see and hear each other, so it was almost like being together in person. I don’t exactly remember when it happened, but Roland volunteered to work with me as a technical “wingman” for my online “Difference Makers” shows.
It’s almost impossible to interview a guest and keep track of the audience’s written comments simultaneously. With Roland helping me, I was able to have an interactive show that ran smoothly. I could have no better friend.
For almost every program, Roland was there. Preparing for thirty minutes before each program. Making sure the sound and lighting was just perfect. Helping my guest feel comfortable. Monitoring comments from our live audience. Soon, my husband Joel got to meet Roland through the computer. Then, we both met Roland’s wife Barbara, and we all quickly became friends.
Highlights of our virtual friendship …
- A caring, giving relationship
- Being trustworthy and kind
- Willing to support each other
When The Opportunity Arose… Guess Who We Visited?
Joel and I wanted to take a quick getaway last year, and we decided to visit California. Can you guess who we saw? Our virtual friends, Roland and Barbara!
What a joyful reunion! We knew each other so well. We couldn’t stop talking. And laughing. And giving each other hugs.
Here we are at The Mission Restaurant in San Diego.
Before we knew it, another year flew by…
Over the past year, our virtual friendship has benefitted from that personal experience. We’ve collaborated in business and supported each other as friends. When Joel and I considered a brief vacation getaway, we decided to see Roland and Barbara again.
On February 4th, 2017, Roland invited me to be a guest on his “Saturday Morning Marketing Smarties” show. For the first time, we were talking from the same room!
The program was focused on, “Virtual Friendships Turning Real.” Roland’s virtual friend, Bill Graham from Belize, volunteered to be the wingman, handling the audience comments. Roland was the host, I was the guest, and we had a wonderful time. How exciting it was to be sitting in chairs side by side.
Here we are before the broadcast…
What can virtual friendships mean for you?
Virtual friendships, like any friendship, must be based on trust. It’s important to have integrity. Keep your word when you make a promise. Stay in touch. Once trust is established, a virtual friendship will reap the same joyful rewards as you’d receive from any good friend.
Vaudeville performer Will Rogers is credited with saying, “A stranger is a friend I haven’t met yet.” Isn’t that a positive way to look at people?
Let’s consider making strangers into new friends. All it takes is a smile. A kind word. A thoughtful action. We all share the same earth, air and water. We’re one humankind. If more people understood that oneness, our world could be a more peaceful place.
I invite you to discover the invisible bonds between us.
Together, we can gain new perspectives as we learn about each other, building relationships from our heart. A virtual friendship can start with the simple words,“What can I do to serve you?”
Let us savor the gift we give ourselves… the gift of friendship that can touch our souls forever!
Lynn Sanders extends a big “Thank You!” to @Ken Dunn for creating GoRead, the fastest-growing community of readers, writers and authors, and @Bill Bergfeld, for taking so much time to explain the technical details behind this marvelous site.
You can get connected with Lynn on Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and Google+. Feel free to subscribe to her free story marketing tips at: https://differencemakersmedia.com.
by Lynn Sanders | Jun 1, 2018 | DMM Blog
It was a day I won’t forget. On Saturday morning, January 21st, 2017, I woke up early and joined 250,000 people in The Women’s March in Chicago. Being a part of that march felt historic, and I’d like to share my experience with you.
You may wonder, why did I participate? I’m not a typical protestor. I haven’t often taken my views to the streets. I shy away from confrontation. Still, I felt compelled to participate. It represented an important way to share my numerous concerns about our new administration.
Despite some anxiety about potential violence, I pushed my worries aside. Here was an opportunity to voice my concerns about protecting women’s rights, healthcare, LGBTQ, immigration, and environmental rights. I’ve been worried that so many basic rights we’ve taken for granted are now in jeopardy. Since I’d be joining members from my synagogue, Congregation Hakafa, I felt more secure. At least I’d have company.
BEFORE THE MARCH
At 7:30 am, I hurriedly made a simple sign, “Rights For All Americans,” and dashed out the door. I drove to our local “L” (“elevated”) station, purchased my tickets and parking token, and made my way to the upper platform. No one could never have anticipated the crowds would swell to such enormous proportions.
After entering the Wilmette train (first stop), I was lucky to get a seat. It would soon be jammed with people, elbow to elbow. I texted my two brothers and sister in different states, and their responses showed me they didn’t understand. “What good will it do?” they texted back. “Be careful,” wrote my sister. They didn’t get it. At one point, someone had a medical emergency, and the train stopped as people started shouting for a doctor. A typical trip to Chicago takes about 45 minutes. On this day, it took almost two hours! But it didn’t matter. We were united by a passion for human rights.
AT THE MARCH
I’ve lived in Chicago my entire life, and I’ve NEVER seen so many people on the street. People snapped photos right and left. Children walked beside their moms and dads. Many wore knitted pink caps with cat ears, nicknamed “pussy hats” – a symbol of the march that poked fun at the derisive remarks made by this new President. After waiting 90 minutes in Grant Park, we finally started moving. Police guards nodded. Helicopters flew overhead. We chanted, waved signs and silently prayed for a more humane world.
To me, it doesn’t matter whether you’re Democrat or Republican. What matters is our government is supposed to be FOR the people, BY the people. The public display of discontent will hopefully make a difference. I don’t know. But at least it’s something positive I can do.
Why I marched…
- To Be Heard. We chanted, “Love not hate – makes America great.”
”Tell me what democracy looks like… THIS is what democracy looks like!”
The march allowed everyone to present a strong message to our government. “Human Rights = Women’s Rights.” We oppose Trump’s nominees for Cabinet, who have their own special interests in mind.
- Social Justice. We all deserve respect, kindness and justice. No matter what anyone’s race, religion, or sexual preference, we all deserve equal rights. To have equal access to voting. To live without walls. To treat immigrants fairly.
- Protect Our Environment. In order to survive, we need clean water, air and land. If our government decides to abandon regulations over pollution controls, the harm to our environment, animals and people could be irreparable.
- Healthcare Access. If we take away our current Obamacare for those with pre-existing conditions, what will happen to millions of people? We all deserve healthcare.
AFTER THE MARCH
No one could have realized ahead of time how many people would show up!
USA Today reported that more than 1 MILLION people joined marches in over 600 sister cities around the country and world. In Washington, DC, an estimated 500,000 people marched. CNBC reports that 300 million women from around the world, including London, Berlin and Tokyo. Even the people in Antarctica marched!
As far as I know, nothing in that proportion has ever happened in our country before! That’s why – no matter whether you’re in favor or marches of not, the significance of this massive protest must be acknowledged.
In the short time since President Trump has taken office, millions of people have already been stripped of their rights. The latest news states: “He plans to gut the Office on Violence against Women. He is going to sign an order to ban refugees and Muslims from entering the country. He is threatening to strip funds from sanctuary cities who welcome immigrants. (And do we need to pay billions to build a wall?)
If we are to keep our liberties as “one nation, under G-d, with liberty and justice for all,” I feel we must – we must — continue to let our voices be heard!
by Lynn Sanders | May 31, 2018 | DMM Blog
“Once you get started, you can never turn back.”
I’ll never forget Milda’s words. Her warning tone sounded ominous. What might lie ahead?
Was I up for the challenge? This client was warning me about taking a spiritual journey. I wanted to know, “Why am I here?” “Where was I before this life?” “What do I need to learn now?”
I couldn’t resist learning more. In fact, exploring the world of spirituality has been and continues to be compelling, fascinating and ongoing. I’d like to share a few lessons I’ve learned.
Lesson #1: We’re All Connected
(A precious snapshot of my dear senior friend, Bobbi and our dog, Henrietta)
If you’re reading these words right now, you’re probably meant to be here. Our words, thoughts and attitudes attract those of similar energy. Like attracts like. That’s why when we connect with others who share our interests, we feel an immediate rapport. We’re actually sharing a similar energy frequency.
If everyone recognized the Divine connection between us, think about how we could change the world! No more wars, fighting or violence. We’d naturally seek peace across all races, religions, cultures and countries. We’d be like the branches on the same tree. Growing on our own, and yet respectful of each other’s soul growth. That’s why it’s important to share our positive thoughts into the world. More people need to hear loving words. Those words can heal our collective soul.
Lesson #2: LISTEN To Your Own Inner Guidance
I believe we each have a Higher source, as well as spirit guides and angels to guide us.
It’s just up to us to listen. If we need help, we just need to ask for guidance. Guidance happens at any time. You could have been given just the right words to write in your book. Or, you may literally take “the road less traveled by” and discover it was a life-saver. Or, you find yourself led to someone who makes a significant impact in your life.
Different situations have happened to me which reinforce my belief in the spiritual world. When I write, I often ask for guidance and can feel the words flow through me. This summer, after making a resolute decision to get a long-awaited children’s book finished, I finally published “Dancing With Tex: The Remarkable Friendship To Save The Whooping Cranes.”
Here’s another example. One night, my husband Joel felt guided to take a side road instead of the highway. That decision to take the slower route home saved us from an accident that happened at the same time. And lately, I’ve been aware of how the right people come into my life, so we can build our impact together.
LESSON #3: Tap Into Your Passion
What’s your passion? What do you love to do more than anything else? You’d even do it for free, because you love it so much. I love both writing and music.
My first book, “Social Justice: How You Can Make A Difference” was a work for hire. Capstone Press hired me to write this book as part of a series on justice. Even though I’d receive no royalties, I went ahead with the project. My passion for writing about this topic gave me joy, satisfaction and fulfillment.
Your inner guidance system is like a personal GPS, your soul’s radar. If you pay attention to what your soul advises you to do, you’ll make the right decisions. If not, you can suffer consequences. During your soul’s journey, it’s inevitable you’ll face challenges. The challenges can drain your energy. What can you do?
When Joel needs a spiritual boost, he searches for uplifting YouTube videos or music. As a fan of Irish cullture, he recently found a great video of Irish flash mob dancers at the Dublin airport. Another favorite is tuning in to the best auditions on America’s Got Talent. He loves re-watching Susan Boyle’s first audition. This scene has many millions of views for a reason. People feel great from this positive energy on the screen!
Lesson #4: Be Kind To Yourself!
(Photo from our family’s healthcare mission to Ecuador. I got exhilarated while spending all day in the hot sun, teaching songs and playing games with children in need.)
We’re here to learn lessons on Earth. Our soul grows from all our experiences, whether we call them bad or good. Not everyone will be on the same path as we are. But when we give to others who appreciate us, we’ll receive much more back in return. When the going gets tough, here are a few tips to uplift your soul.
1. Put A White Light Around Yourself. When you face a challenge, imagine a spotlight of white light surrounding you. The white light represents pure, loving energy and can serve as a protective shield.
2. Feel The Oneness With Nature. Walk outside and breathe deeply. Feel the beauty of the earth, the plants and animals. You may want to get close to a tree and even give it a hug!
3. “Carpe Diem” (Latin for “Seize the Moment.”) Take a moment to step away from the computer, phone, or people. Put a “Please do not disturb” sign on your door. Sit quietly in a comfortable chair, close your eyes, and allow yourself to meditate. Or take time to read a good book.
4. Treat Yourself. What makes YOU happy? Do something just for you. Before we can truly love others, we need to love ourselves.
We’re here for a reason. A reason we may not even be aware of at this time. As we each move along our journey, remember you are not alone. You have loving spirits, angels and guides around you. Even your friends serve as your angels on earth. Allow yourself to open up to the possibilities of the spiritual dimension.
Once you embark on a spiritual path of self-reflection and growth, it’s true that you’ll never go back to the way you were. Instead, your life becomes filled with more exciting possibilities. Here’s to you!
by Lynn Sanders | May 31, 2018 | DMM Blog
Dear Friend:
If you’re drawn to this topic and reading my words, there may be a higher reason for us to meet across this page. Perhaps, just perhaps, we belong to the same soul family. Maybe you and I are soulmates… even from a distance… and even if we barely know each other right now.
I can just see you. Your eyebrows are raising. You may be thinking – “What is she talking about?” You may even decide to stop reading.
Or, you might be nodding your head, “yes.” You heard me right. A soulmate doesn’t have to be a romantic companion. It’s not necessarily a special person who makes us feel fulfilled. Soulmates don’t even have to be someone we know well.
I understand that soulmate connections can happen at any time and any place. As Sue Minns explains in her book, “Soulmates: Understanding The True Gifts of Intense Encounters,”our soulmates can be anyone with whom we have an intense connection — positively or negatively.
They are people we can’t ignore. Their job is to teach us something. Once we understand the meaning and purpose of a soulmate’s presence, we can choose to discontinue the relationship. Or, we may recognize the importance of keeping that connection. Many of you authors are radiating your message and connecting with a mass of people. Isn’t it incredible to think how many lives we can touch with our words?
In any event, soulmates test us, and sometimes, they can drive us almost crazy.
Soulmates are the best thing that happen to us. Everyone will encounter at least one. They can be a mother-in-law, siblings, bosses, parents, colleagues… anyone. Just realize that our experiences with them will shed light on the chance to learn about ourselves and our nature.
What’s a soul?
A quick Google search says, “The spiritual or immaterial part of a human being or animal, regarded as immortal.”
I think of our soul as our essence. Just as our physical, mental and emotional self can grow and learn, I believe our souls are put here on earth to do the same, often by taking on challenges that give us the chance to move forward.
Here’s a deeper perspective by Sue Minns:
“The One gave birth to souls without number in order to experience itself… Each atom of the One contained the polarities of negative and positive in complementary perfection, symbolized by the ancient symbol of yin and yang. Each half, though different, contained the essential seed of the other…
“This separation was a vital experience on the soul’s journey. This is the source of our yearning for union, and our search for the love that we once knew… We look for this reunion in the physical form of a soulmate.”
Soul Groups
It’s fascinating to learn that each soul belongs to a group. Maybe that’s why we all are drawn to the GoRead community. We’re sharing something that’s invisible. A spiritual, emotional connection. A feeling that we’re on this journey of learning together.
I feel connected with so many of you, especially after reading your stories. Most of you probably don’t realize that. After sharing your articles, I wonder — what can I possibly say that will make a difference? What stories can I write that will attract others? Will I ever scale the heights to make it to the top of the articles list?
It can almost feel intimidating because I have so much to say. Yet, I have to allow myself to overcome doubts, worry and the feeling of unworthiness. I’ve never been disciplined to write a blog every week. Yet, that’s what I want to do. So, I push past these limiting beliefs, because I want to connect with you on a deep level.
While our physical bodies see everything in a limited, finite way — moving along a timeline of past, present and future — our spiritual world operates differently. If you’re open-minded to this concept, consider that our growth doesn’t just stop after our current lifetime. We’ve been on this journey before. And maybe, you and I were together in a distant past.
Soul Themes
In the book, Soulmates, I read that members of a group are all working on the same soul theme. That theme will appear consistently in different lifetimes, although we’re sometimes given a respite. In order for our soul to grow, we need to experience all aspects of a chosen theme.
That means we’ll be confronted with both sides of each theme, namely the opposite of what we’re working on. Here’s a checklist of some major themes:
Abandonment * Forgiveness * Betrayal * Persecution * Exile and belonging * Judgement * Poverty * Spirituality * Guild * Justice * Trust * Intimacy * Sexuality * Power * Freedom * Disease
If you can perceive each event in your life as a gift, you’ll have a clue about your soul’s theme. Every event carries a “charge.” What do you think is the theme you’re working on now? I believe mine is dealing with the theme of power. That’s why I have to experience the feeling of powerlessness. I’m working on being able to speak up.
There is a positive, gentle way to express yourself without damaging relationships. My friend and best-selling author, Bob Burg wrote a book about it called, “Winning Without Intimidation.” It’s a great book to read, whenever you have a chance.
In my next blog, I’d like to share a personal experience that’s a reflection on my personal theme. It’s a story that has shaped my soul. I hope you’ll check it out.
Until then… have a great week and just know how special you ARE!
Remember: We are living in the “present.” Our present is a “gift.”
Make the most of it!
by Lynn Sanders | May 31, 2018 | DMM Blog
“We do not choose the work we are brought into this lifetime to do. That work is your soul signature – your unique expression. Your Spiritual DNA.” Panache Desai, “Discovering Your Soul Signature”
In my last article, I spoke with you about soulmates. If you missed it, I’d suggest reading it over to understand how soulmates help us learn life lessons. Soulmates are anyone with whom we have a strong emotional connection: positively or negatively, and support us in learning life lessons.
After doing much contemplating, I’d like to share a very personal, emotional story with you. I need to say this is a tough story to tell. If you are reluctant to share it, I totally understand. The reason I’m willing to be vulnerable is because the ultimate lessons I learned (and continue learning) may be of value to you. These lessons – in claiming one’s own independence and power… and recognizing that love is eternal… came to me through one of the most beloved people in my life: my mother.
No matter who you are, or in what situation you face, I want to assure you: you are never alone. You have loved ones, spirit guides and even angels to help you out. Perhaps my story will give you hope. A fresh perspective on life and death. A chance to see the gift from the challenges you face. In any event, there is so much to say that I’ll be writing more in my next article.
This story began on December 16th, 2004, at 11:20 pm, when the phone rang. An odd time for a phone call. I had just finished practicing a song on the piano that I planned to play at a funeral the next morning. When I picked up the phone, my brother Mark was on the line. His voice was tense.
“Lynn…I’ve got bad news. Mom had a heart attack, and it doesn’t look good.”
My breath stopped. I couldn’t move. My heartbeat seemed to skip a beat.
“WHAT?” My voice almost shrieked. “What did you say?” My mind refused to believe what I was hearing. My body started shaking.
What was my mother doing in Las Vegas with my brother’s family? No one had even told me she was there. I had tried reaching her in Florida over the past three days, but hadn’t heard back. If seemed odd, because we usually spoke over the phone almost every day. I figured she was busy. Due to unfortunate family dynamics, no one told me where she was.
My brother repeated himself. I felt numb. Mark had to go. The ambulance was waiting. He would call me back as soon as he knew more. I hung up and wailed. A long, high-pitched scream. A wail of pain and anguish. My mother, my lifeline, my dearest friend, my buddy. I did not want to imagine living in this world without her. I’m sure I sounded as though I were dying too.
My husband, Joel rushed over. With tears streaming down my face, I blurted out my deepest fear. Joel uttered the only comfort he could think of, “You never know, she might pull through.” I clung onto his words, but inside myself, I didn’t feel hopeful.
I called my father in Florida. It was about 12:45 am (ET), and now, thirteen years later, I barely remember what was said. I think he said, “It doesn’t look good…” His voice sounded hollow. Mom was the lifelife of our family. How could this happen? Dad had to get off the phone to wait for any update from my brother Mark.
Just twenty minutes later, the phone rang again. I’ll never forget his words.
“Lynn, I’m sorry to tell you… She didn’t make it.”
“NO! NO…” I shouted, shivering violently. Even now, tears come to my eyes when I remember that horrible night. Mark had to hang up and tell the rest of the family. He needed me to call the Chicago area relatives and let them know there would be a funeral on Sunday… a few days away.
I closed my eyes, as I felt my heart being pulled apart. I was falling, falling, falling into a deep dark pit. An endless abyss. No way out. I made myself call my dear senior friend, Bobette Zacharias, to tell that I couldn’t sing or perform for her friend’s funeral on the next morning. My voice sounded so raspy that she didn’t even recognize it was me.
Somehow, I made it through the next day, breaking down and crying during each call. I’d beg every person to please notify someone else on my list. It was a heart-wrenching task, telling unsuspecting friends and family members this shocking, painful news.
My mother was the most cheerful, loving, radiant soul you could ever meet. You can get an idea from her photo. She made strangers smile with her genuine loving presence. As a former Sunday School and Hebrew School teacher, she had a natural knack of relating with young and old alike. Six years younger than my father, she had worried how she’d manage when my father died. No one could have imagined she’d pass away at age 73. I had only one source of refuge: her emails.
I had purposely saved those emails during that last year. Maybe my soul suspected something might happen. Consciously, I just wanted to re-read them because they felt so reassuring. Over the past few days, she had written about overcoming grief. Just six weeks earlier, one of my best friends, Nancy, had died of a heart attack. I was so bereft that mom’s messages gave me comfort. Now, ironically, I had those same emails to help me cope with this tragedy. I read her words aloud at her funeral during that frigid December funeral. I’d like to share her treasured words with you.
MOM’S FINAL EMAILS…
September 27th, 2004
We look back on our problems and say “I can’t believe I worried about that!” Life is full of problems–it’s how you deal with them that’s important. So just relax and laugh and count your blessings.
October 1st, 2004
How did I ever get so lucky to have you for a daughter. God really blessed me. What a beautiful story you wrote. Thank you for all the kind words. My best blessing for you would be that your children when they become adults should look upon you and give you the same joy that you give me.
November 30th, 2004
You are the joy of my life. What did I ever do to deserve such a wonderful daughter. You have made my day… Good luck on all your paying jobs. Actually good luck on everything. Anyway just enjoy the day. It will never come back so make the most of it (how’s that for philosophy first thing in the morning)…
November 5th, 2004
“You and I have to celebrate LIFE and go on. We have people and things dependent on us and therefore for the remaining time granted us on this earth we must function to the best of our abilities. Remember we will all of us die one day and therefore death cannot be the end. We must give our loved ones precious memories of us to treasure. So wipe your eyes, look your best, hold up your head and GO FACE THE WORLD.
Sending hugs and kisses and
LOVE, MOM
December 2nd, 2004
Beating yourself up over something you said or should have said helps no one especially yourself.
Mom was right. Death is not the end. The power of love never stops.
As I discovered, mom’s soulmate connection with me continued. (And still does.) While I miss her terribly, I know her spirit is still here… helping me when I need her. I’m sure she’d be glad to reassure you too. She was a compassionate woman who others naturally turned to.
So, if you have to deal with a difficult situation in life, ask your heart for an answer. At the end of our darkest tunnel, if we’re willing to take one small step after another, we can be led to those who can guide us forward.
In my next blog, I’ll share what happened later. Till then – may you know that you are always loved.
Love is a part of you. And you are a part of love. Ultimately, we are all connected.
